ED is so far removed from our family's life that if people don't know us or our d's history they would NEVER know that ED was a part of our lives for a couple of years. We don't hide this fact but we don't go around talking or sharing about Eating Disorders or our past.

 

I know that we will have to address this when dd gets ready to go to college. Stephanie M. (Super T) told me to send her to college with a contract and relapse prevention plan. I also envision having a conversation with her future husband and maybe at other milestones of her life such as pregnancy, etc. But until those times come, we are enjoying our d without the shadow of the Eating Disorder. I admit, there are a couple of things that will still trigger discomfort in me: seeing her running in a treadmill or if she says "I look fat in this picture" but that is temporary and I quickly recovery from the gut reaction.

 

For about 2 years I kept reacting like a bull in a china shop at every little thing that triggered ED fears in me. My gifted communicator of a d, let me know that it hurt her that I couldn't let the ED go. She also said to me "I NEED you to stop seeing me through filters, the ED filter, the ADHD filter, the LD filter" See ME for who I AM! Boy, I needed her to say that to me and I am honoring her request.

 

My wish for all of you Mommas of young ones is that you will also experience this kind of freedom for the years to come. I hope that your young kids will be able to have normal lives with you monitoring in the background. I hope that you will be able to relax mentally and emotionally and create this sixth sense that allows youto monitor as a natural part of your parenting do but it doesn't cause you stress.

 Our FBT told us, when she dismissed us from T "always assume that what you see if teenage behavior first. Don't jump t the conclusion that it is ED immediately. She also told me to look for patterns of behavior and not assume that every individual behavior was ED driven". Our children receive a gift when we are able to let this fear go and enjoy them as healthy children (some time) after we see evidence of their remission/recovery.

 Maria from the Preventing relapse thread

My D is in stage 2, with now either lunch or snack (we prepare and set this aside for her) every day on her own, plus eating dinner out socially with a friend on weekends.

Her weight is still stable now after 3 weeks of this solo eating.

But she's ANGRY any time my H or I ask her about what she ate, or talk about plans for meals in the future (for example, having company over). Or when I asked her about clothes (e.g., I asked did she want to look for a bathing suit online, she's wearing shorts and tank tops).  This anger is new. 

What gives? I think she's eating.  I know it is too early for her to have any insight or to even acknowledge her problem...
Strongmom from the stage two anger- what's up? thread

http://www.maudsleyparents.org/bostonconference.html

 

I will be going. Would love to connect with some other FEAST parents at this one day conference Friday Sept. 28, 2012!!!!

 

 Keynote speakers. Dr.s Lock and LeGrange, and Dr. Rebekah Peebles of Childrens Hosptial of Philadelphia: CHOP. Early bird $60

It has been a very long time since I have been on here.  But a few years ago I helped my daughter recover from AN at home (and this forum was my lifesaver), then about a year and a half ago she had a relapse and we went through recovery again.

This year she is doing so well....but her BMI is also the highest it has ever been.  She is at the higher end of her weight range (but she is very athletic so a lot of it is muscle and she is in good shape).  But she is eating in a more relaxed way than I have seen her eat in years.  She still makes comments and she still wishes to be thinner (doesn't help that her twin sister is thinner now), but she is still eating well and buying new clothes in a bigger size and even going to the swimming pool in a bikini....things that would have been so hard a while back.

I remember back when I was visiting this forum a lot, that people would comment on how much better the girls were when they were at a higher BMI....so why is that?  Does anyone know? 

She told me the other day what her weight is...and for years we have been having her weigh backwards and not telling her (her AN started 6 years ago)...but she weighed herself at a friends and seems to be OK with it even though she has never been close to that number before.

So I am happy she is doing so well and feeling better.....but I am still trying to understand WHY being at a higher BMI makes that difference mentally.  I realize they need to be in the 'healthy' range to be safe...but why is it that the 'thoughts' are so improved with an even higher BMI?
Thanks
DJ from the Why are they better mentally at a higher BMI thread

The Kartini Clinic blog has an excellent post about a study examining the factors that most predict weight gain in anorexic kids. The #1 factor is...parental ability to support nutrition. The blog is at http://www.kartiniclinic.com/blog/post/what-helps-children-with-anorexia-nervosa-gain-weight/.

I am posting this here because I am in the trenches, doing 100% nutrition 100% of the time and as you all know, it's hard work. This kind of information helps to keep me strong and remember that the slog I do every day is necessary, effective and supported by scientific research. Happy reading (it's very short!) and keep feeding.
breathingmomUSA from the Key factor in helping with weight gain