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Around the Dinner Table Forum Recent Threads

Attempted suicideOpen in a New Window

This post is really just to express my worries for the future of my D (15 y.o, 3 months WR). 
Although closely supervised, she asked for more independence and wanted to buy toiletries for herself by herself. I waited in the car. Checked the receipt, all good. Second trip, I didn't check the receipt, and in retrospect she did try her best to distract me with chatter. It worked. She bought herself sleeping pills (Benadryl), and the night after, she took all 20 pills. We found her at night by sheer luck on the floor, awake but unresponsive. Then I raided garbage cans and her closet and found the empty box. She spent 2 days in the hospital, and was transfer to an acute psychiatric adolescent place. She is goin to be observed and assessed there, and they are talking to send her to a long term psychiatric care in Ontario, 2 hrs from home. The staff is aware that she needs to maintain her weight, and they accommodate eating disorders too but I am worried sick because she had to be off food for 1.5 day while in the hospital. The reason was that she felt lonely. She has a difficulty socializing, interpreting social cues, even when something goes right, it goes wrong for her in her head, it has been an issue for past 3 years and it was a trigger for her AN I believe. Despite working on social skills through local programs she is still struggling very much. She is ASD so that contributes to her social non-functioning. So now, she is under 24/7 watch at the unit, she was brought there last night but she keeps talking about preferring to be dead. Please keep her in your thoughts, and thank you for being there as my outlet <3

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'Around the Dinner Table' Online Forum for Parents and Carers

 

Spanish ResourcesOpen in a New Window



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'Around the Dinner Table' Online Forum for Parents and Carers

 

New here and I got a question to ask!Open in a New Window

Hi, I found this forum via the Eva Musby website/book. My 14yr old daughter has been self harming for approx 3 years, and has had periods of restricted eating, which now manifests it’s self fully. She has just been referred to Maudsley Hospital, although we haven’t received news of her first appointment yet.



But, although I have been following FBT at home I still have a few worries.



Today she complains about how fat her legs are (they are not of course) yet went to school with a short skirt on, and knee high socks. This also shows her self harming scars, some of which are recent. I suppose I am struggling to understand the contradiction: claims to hate her ‘fat legs’ yet shows them to the world?? I know that this illness is a web of contradictions and I have complete compassionate for her, I am also pragmatic, and can’t quite understand this contradiction. I am a recovering alcoholic myself so absolutely conversant with mental health problems. But I can’t help wonder how much is attention seeking, to perhaps garner the attention she needs which might make her feel better.



I’m confused. I know self harming and anorexia isn’t around attention seeking, but her behaviour suggests otherwise!!!!



Any insight or help would be fab.



Jamie

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'Around the Dinner Table' Online Forum for Parents and Carers

 

Period is back...Open in a New Window

My daughter’s period is back. Yay!!  At least ‘yay’ for me. She is having a very difficult time with it. To the point of refusing to eat again. It’s been awhile since we’ve experienced this kind of push back. We were an hour late for school this morning. I told her it’s ‘breakfast first then school ‘. It was painful and I wasn’t very graceful this morning with my support of her. My own anxiety kicked in as I have two appts and another daughter to drive to school this morning. I think I actually told her ‘you are a pain in my ass’...  . I was calm for most of it but my anxiety was apparent to both her and her sister.

How can I better help her adjust to having her period back? (Obviously saying kinder things than above).

Oh and she did end up eating so that is good!!

Category:

'Around the Dinner Table' Online Forum for Parents and Carers

 

19 year old daughter relapseOpen in a New Window

I thought we'd seen the back of this illness but here we are again, sigh.

My d had 6 month inpatient care back in 2013 and since then, with some ups and downs, made slow but steady progress and last year was finally eating freely and decided to gain weight herself and I thought all was well with the eating.

Alongside this though she started to experience really bad anxiety (wouldn't go out of the house, wouldn't talk to anyone apart from close family).  THere's a possibility of ASD (currently waitiing for an assessment) and one psych diagnosed BPD.  Various psychiatrists prescribed a whole range of different meds and then one withdrew everything, including a med that she'd taken since inpatient care.  All meds went within 6 weeks, and then all of a sudden the ED came back.  That was back in the summer and I saw straightaway that something was up.  I kept flagging it up with the Adult Mental Health Team but they told me I was being alarmist, and guess what, too controlling.

Her eating declined.  I rang, made appointments, waved red flags but since August has only had two hours of ED therapy.  Now, they've finally got worried, but her relapse is so entrenched I can't reach her and fear the only option now is hospital. I've asked our GP if she can expedite the admission as why is ED the only illness where they wait until you're really on death's door before treating you??  However, it looks like we will have to see this play out with all the anxiety and worry that brings.

My d lives at home, has no work, hasn't been able to continue further education and all she has to think about is her ED. She has no friends, and her family are her only point of contact.  

As she's an adult, I can't do anything and have no leverage.  My d sought treatment herself, wanted an admission to hospital so that she can have control taken away from her and gain some support and therapy.  However, the illness has now got such a hold that that willingness is starting to disappear. 

I don't know now how to help my d - most conversations with her are becoming confrontational, she is hiding her food away and won't eat with us.  I have no idea what she is eating.  My previous tactics (before she reached 18) which were to take control of her eating is no longer viable and not backed up by the treatment team.  Instead I have to step back and watch, and encourage where I can.  Anyone any ideas?


Category:

'Around the Dinner Table' Online Forum for Parents and Carers

 

Has anyone ever heard of Food Addicts or EatingDisordersAnonymous?Open in a New Window

Hi Everyone,
Have you ever heard of these organizations? Any feedback?

eatingdisordersanonymous - http://eatingdisordersanonymous.org/
Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous - https://www.foodaddicts.org/

Thanks for any feedback you can provide.

Category:

'Around the Dinner Table' Online Forum for Parents and Carers

 

Olanzapine (Zyprexa)Open in a New Window

Was just reading some medical literature and talking to a friend who is an oncologist.  He now uses Zyprexa almost exclusively with patients on chemo to prevent nausea!!  He has found it actually helps much more with nausea than any other drug he could use including vitamin Z (Zofran).  He uses it in low doses to help with nausea and anxiety.

I thought it was interesting and applicable to our kids since nausea and stomach issues are often a side effect of refeeding.

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'Around the Dinner Table' Online Forum for Parents and Carers

 

Birth Control Pills and Weight Gain?Open in a New Window

Hi,

Is there any evidence that any of you might know of either in studies or by any personal experience, that birth control pills can add some weight? 

Just curious

Kali

Category:

'Around the Dinner Table' Online Forum for Parents and Carers

 

Extreme hunger in daughter?Open in a New Window

My 13 year old d is currently in her third week of recovery.

Food has been going fine, she seems to have more life in her.

Today, I found her downstairs, in the kitchen, crying... she said she had eaten half a jar of peanut butter, a jar of tomato sauce, and half the chocolate banana cake we had in the fridge (her favorite cake pre-ed). I told her it was ok, that she needed it, but she is very upset. She tells me can't stop eating, and feels out of control. 

She also tells me she is always hungry, and immediately after meals gets hungry again, and is always waiting for permission to eat... I told her she has permission to eat and watches the clock until her next meal or snack. She should eat whatever and how ever much she wants. But she told me she needed someone to force her to eat to feel justified to eat. 

How can I console her?

Category:

'Around the Dinner Table' Online Forum for Parents and Carers

 

Carer Distress Tolerance - excellent article with Prof Janet Treasure , covers a range of topics. More links on carer distress belowOpen in a New Window

https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s11920-015-0652-3

Category:

'Around the Dinner Table' Online Forum for Parents and Carers

 

LostOpen in a New Window

My D is 18 just been diagnosed with anorexia, got help really quickly through GP referral to Eating disorder clinic(which I feel so grateful for as have read so many stories about parents who have had to battle to get that) but think it was because her BMI was so dangerously low, we have an appointment each week we attend to see a nurse, so have been doing re feeding at home which is going great for me as my D is eating again, but she is struggling, she has the option of day patient but her choice at 18,does anyone recommend day patient or stay at home

Category:

'Around the Dinner Table' Online Forum for Parents and Carers

 

GI issues due to refeedingOpen in a New Window

Hi everyone!! We're past the 2 year mark after refeeding, and my daughter is a beautiful 14 year old that is getting better and better every day!

I wanted to write a quick post about something that we've encountered since refeeding and has been a huge issue. So much fat (cream, butter, oils) really put a toll on my daughter's digestive system and we've been dealing with this ever since refeeding. I'm not sure if there's any way to deal with this while refeeding: all we wanted -desperately- was for my daughter to gain weight, as fast as possible, and we did what we had to do. But her stomach issues became a new problem I wish we could have avoided. I'm not sure if there's a way to get past this. She has gone through constipation, reflux, and I'm pretty sure she has GERD at this point (gastroesophageal reflux disease). Today, she basically has to eat everything opposite of what she needed at her lowest point. It's nuts. It's getting better and better every day (because we've been pretty drastic in creating a very 'healthy' diet -hate that word-), but I really wish I had known more about this previously, so maybe we could have looked into ways for her Digestive System to not be affected in such a bad way for so long. She has a GI specialist appointment in a week, but up to now, all the doctors have agreed that the issue was the bomb of food she ate every day for months. Not sure if there's any way to avoid this? What do you all think?

Category:

'Around the Dinner Table' Online Forum for Parents and Carers

 

Fat ShamingOpen in a New Window

This is just beyond vile. I complained and hope more people complain.


http://www.esquire.co.uk/life/a18073/giles-coren-overweight-son/

Category:

'Around the Dinner Table' Online Forum for Parents and Carers

 

Thanksgiving, Christmas, Family Gatherings and other Holiday Celebrations.Open in a New Window

http://tabithafarrar.com/podcast/thanksgiving-eating-disorder/

Category:

'Around the Dinner Table' Online Forum for Parents and Carers

 

BEAT Conference Birmingham Nov 22nd, 23rdOpen in a New Window

Is anyone going to the BEAT conference in Birmingham this month? And if so, how would we recognise one another with our codenames? Should we all agree a special handshake, just in case? LOL

Category:

'Around the Dinner Table' Online Forum for Parents and Carers


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